The Photo Session

Mr. DeMille...?


So yesterday I went and had a photographer take my headshots. I took the chance and splurged for a makeup artist, as I have no experience with photography makeup. I have mixed feelings about the results, but then I did go bargain-hunting and answered an online classified ad from a photographer that was "creating a headshot portfolio" so he could expand his business. The ad was for $40 headshots (the makeup artist was $100). I suppose I deserve what I get because you know the old saying... ya get whatcha pay for.

The makeup artist apparently thought I was auditioning for "Pirates of the Caribbean 2" because she rimmed my eyes with heavy black eyeliner. Even the photographer said it needed to be toned down, but by the time she rubbed the excess off with a makeup sponge, my eyes had turned into a bloodshot mess. And I still looked like Norma Desmond waiting for her close-up.

I brought a few changes of clothing to try different necklines and textures (all dark colors, at the photographer's instruction), but he ended up picking one grey turtleneck and only shooting me in that. He said it would cover any neck wrinkles from turning my head this way and that. I was disappointed. I have a nice neckline and cleavage, and I would have like to have gotten at least a couple of shots that showed that off a little bit.

The session itself was underwhelming. He had me tilt my head to one side then the other side, then back, and every single shot he would say "fresh smile... give me a fresh smile." That meant I should relax my face from the last smile and then plaster a new one in its place. So he took about 40 shots of me looking sideways, my black-rimmed bloodshot eyes crinkled at the corners and slid ALL the way to one side or the other and smiling like I was selling dental floss.

I peeked over his shoulder as he uploaded the shots from the media card into his computer (PC with Windows XP... I should have run screaming right then and there). From what I could see of the thumbnails, what I just described above is exactly what I'll be getting. I can only hope that the photos turn out better when they're full sized. I suppose I should consider this a $140 lesson.

This morning I was chatting with a friend, and she told me that her boyfriend took the headshots of another working actor we know. NOW she tells me. Here I could have saved myself $140 and half a bottle of Visene.

Next week I have booked a studio to do my voiceover demo. The engineer emailed me some pieces of commercial copy to work on. It's really boring. My husband has a friend that does stand-up comedy, and I am hoping that he will be able to write some funnier copy to record. I don't want to have a demo that has the same six commercials that everybody else has. Maybe if I have something that gets a laugh from a casting agent, that will help my demo stand out.

The point of all of this is to simply get some work. I know... I didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday... I know how hard it is to break into anything even resembling acting. But after spending fifteen long, hard years sitting behind a desk and killing myself for some corporate committee that doesn't care beans about me, I have to at least try and do something that I enjoy. Life is too short to work at a job you have to psyche yourself up for every morning. I'm still looking for a "real" job and submitting my resume to anything that has the word "manager" in it.

Although bartending is sounding better and better.

Nothing to Lose

Actor seeks Agent


I've decided to go in an altogether different direction. For years, people have been telling me that I should get into voiceovers or radio because I have such a "great voice." I actually have done some voiceover work (the disembodied voice in a hospital scene "paging doctor such-and-such") as well as some commercials, and I did DJ at my college radio station for a time. I also sang several commercial jingles for radio and TV, which is great work if you can find it. Not easy, if you don't have a demo and an agent.

So while I continue seeking work in the field of studio management, I have begun working on getting a decent voiceover demo produced. I am fortunate that I know people in the field, and one very dear friend has been kind enough to get me in touch with his agent. So as soon as I can get the recording done, I will send her a copy and say a prayer. I'll send copies off to as many of the reputable voiceover agents I can find, as well as casting directors. I do have a great speaking voice, and I know I could be able to supplement my income at least. Perhaps even do voiceovers full-time.

My husband also seems to think that I could find work as a character actor or commercial actor. For the past few weeks I have been attending a screenwriter's workshop. Not as a screenwriter, mind you, but as one of the actors in the room that are chosen to read whatever scene or script the writer brings in for evaluation. It's kind of fun -- I get to practice my chops as an actor, and the writer gets the chance to see his or her work done live, which allows them to see what is right and what isn't in their script.

If I may toot my own horn for a minute, I have discovered that I have quite a talent for "cold reading" (for those of you who are unfamiliar with acting terms, that means reading a role without any prior preparation or exposure to the script). It could be due to a shortage of female actors in the group, but it seems like the writers keep choosing me over and over to read for them. It's been good for my confidence as well as my ego.

So later this week I will have headshot photos taken and I will schedule studio time for my voiceover demo. I have started checking the online casting notices for voiceover work, and I have found a few commercial jingle producers that may be willing to add me to their roster of working singers.

I also answered an ad looking for a singer to join a four-woman a cappella singing group in my area. I hope they contact me for an audition -- they do gigs in the LA area, and they have even performed the National Anthem at professional sporting events. Now that sounds like a good time and it would be a great way to get back into the musical and theatrical community.

After all, I do live in Los Angeles.

On the Hunt Again

Freelancing is for Masochists


Well, so much for working until October 3rd. The executive producer decided to cut me loose a week earlier because he's too bloody cheap to pay me an one more week to show my replacement the ropes and get him up to speed. Hey - I'm glad to be out of that place, believe me. I pity the poor guy they hired to replace me as Production Manager. I heard they got him for even less than they paid me, and he has no idea what he's in for.

Note to employers everywhere: You can be a jerk, or you can be cheap, but you cannot be both at the same time. A decent paycheck can do quite a bit to compensate for a jerk of a boss. On the other hand, a happy working environment can help alleviate the strain of substandard pay. But put jerk and cheap together, you get a company that sheds employees like cat fur in the summertime. So if any of you are wondering why you can't seem to find good employees, or you can't keep the ones you do find, be honest with yourself: Does the pay suck? Are you a prick? If you can answer yes to both of these questions, then you just solved the mystery of your employee shortage.

It should be obvious, people. But apparently, it isn't.

The downside is that I'm back on the job hunt. The upside is that after working at that awful TV production for six weeks, I now re-qualify for unemployment benefits.

I'm still looking to find something permanent, preferably in my field of expertise. I've taken this week off to regroup and catch up on things at home, update my resume and get some much-needed quality sleep. The TV show worked us an average of 17 hours a day (no overtime, either), and we never got the customary 12-hour turnaround between shifts, so my sleep clock got all wonky. Besides, I missed being able to have dinner with my husband once in a while. I lost eleven pounds on that job. I look great, but that can't be healthy.

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll take a nap.